It’s probably right to say that most mothers who find that they are pregnant for the second time do not greet the news with the amount of excitement they had for the first time. The reason is obvious.
Gone are the days when you had gone to a baby shopping store with your husband to buy all those tiny articles for your first child. Gone are the days when you had spent months reading those pregnancy special books to collect every possible information required by you. Gone are the days when you had spent days and days trying to knit something wearable for your little one? Gone are the days when you had spent hours Chit-Chatting with your friends and relatives about your expected first child.
Instead you are now a mother and wife trying to cope with all your household duties while earlier you were only a wife and an expecting mother. Right now most of your time is spent on looking after your first child of your time is spent on looking after you first child who is either at the toddler or school-going stage. If you are a working woman, your situation is still worse.
But as a dedicated and duty-conscious woman, you have finally gone through your pregnancy and the birth of your second child and are now back home once again. Life has become all the ore tougher for you because you have two little devils to manage at the same time. What you may observe is that your older child has changed a little and tries to keep to himself most of the time.
Jealousy is an understandable reaction because the new baby has become the focus of attention and the older child may feel insecure and vulnerable.
Here are a few practical tips from our end to help you handle the situation in the best possible manner.
Common Reaction by Age Wise
1. Toddlers (1-3 Year Old)
Reaction: The toddler does not understand what is happening. They were not prepared, so mom will explain.
- First mom will prepare then explain toddler.
2. Pre-schoolers (3-5 years old):
Reaction: The toddler asked more questions to mom; he was jealous of the new baby, but somewhat happy.
3. School-aged Children (5-10 years old)
Reaction: the toddler as understand clearly at same time express clear and excitement.
Overall Practical Tips
- Try to prepare the older child for the baby’s arrival long before it’s due.
- After the birth, let your older child go and look at her little sister or brother in her own time.
- Your older child needs reassurance from your end that she is still loved as much as ever.
- Find another mother whose toddler goes to the same activities as your child so that you can share the taking and collecting duties.
- Spend more time with your older child at weekends when your husband is around to help with the baby.
- At home, make a determined effort to devote some time entirely to your older child. While the baby is having his afternoon sleep or when he has gone to bed in the evening, for example. Few minutes of your undivided attention is a good deal better than only half your concentration during the day.